12WBT Week Two!

So it is officially 1.5wks since I started this.

Today was weigh in day (like every Wednesday).
I have a total of 2.9kg loss so far to date.

I am still finding it hard! I still have the headaches, tiredness, mood swings etc that no one told me about.
I cry or I yell. I curl up on the couch with John at night and fall asleep on his lap. I wake up and feel like I want to puke.
I have no energy.

I know, this is NOT what you want to hear if you are following my journey, but I am truthful. I can't go RAH RAH RAH THIS IS GREAT if I don't feel that way. I am tired and thirsty and can't concentrate and I'm hungry!
John says it will all pass, but I need to keep going. I intend to keep going, but this is NOT what I wanted to have and I hate feeling this way only 1.5wks into the challenge.

I pop my back out during workouts (which is painful since I have a back injury lol)
I hurt and I ache and I don't have the get up and go to jump through a workout or go from lunges to burpees.
In fact, Im pretty sure my pelvic floor muscles are WEAKER now than when I started lol. What with all the jumping and lunging and squating and burpees etc lol I am not surprised.

The upside?

My tummy is shrinking! Yes, it is actually disappearing on me.
My jeans are falling down! But I am still a wee bit big for the next size down.
My water intake is triple what it usually was! And I pee less
My grocery budget is cheaper! Because John and the kids are eating the same as me for dinner (John is doing lunch and dinner).
I feel great after a workout! And I get to do the laundry etc (after sitting on my kaboosh most of the day holding my eyes open)

So while I feel like utter crap and I am emotional and crabby, there are some upsides.

This really is HARD. No one told me how hard it was going to be, so I am telling you.
Its a huge emotional road. What you see on The Biggest Loser show, is pretty much how it is when you cut your food down and exercise every day!
I chose the weight loss plan and I get a 1200 calorie allowance each day and I have 45mins of exercise PLUS the things we do each day that we don't think about.

I need to get lunch and then I have an appt to get my butt to today....

Much Love
xoxo

#blog challenge 12/8/12 onwards

What's an eco-friendly organization that you could get behind and support?
Im not too sure if we have any eco-friendly organizations around where I am....will have a looksee.

What type of schooling do you currently or plan to do with your children?
I don't understand this prompt. My kids are currently in Primary School. They are year 0 and year 3.
I have done Secondary education and did start a business degree, but had to put that on hold when I fell pregnant with Declan. I plan to start that up when he gets a bit older.

Give a good piece of advice to first time parents.
I think the best piece of advice I can give to a first time parent is to take what people say and filter out what doesn't work for you.
When I had Andrew, I didn't have the internet or coffee groups etc. I had no family or friends. I had PLUNKET. They came into my home and told me I was a crap parent and that I needed to do what they said etc. Luckily one of my aunties came in and helped me to weed out the crap plunket told me and make it suit how I was as a person and a mother.
So the best advice I can give is to take what is said with a grain of salt. Also, if you need help ask for it, because it wont always come to you if you don't speak out.

The hardest part of parenting is...
not succumbing to what everybody else is doing and buying.
I have learnt that parenting is sooo much different to what it was when I was a first time parent. We coped with basic clothing, toys, pram, carseat, and hand me downs. When I became a parent to Declan too, it all changed and everyone was all about the newest and latest carseat, cot, pram, toys, clothes etc. Then you have the toys as they get older and the after school activities etc. The hardest part of parenting is to not "keep up with the Joneses"

10 things you love about your significant other (or kids or pets)
I read this as about everyone hehe....so I will do 5 for the kids and 5 for John (because I love them all)

Andrew and Declan

1. They make me laugh
2. They make me look at the world differently
3. I miss them when they are at school because they aren't here with me
4. I love the way they love movies..they are currently into The Avengers
5. They like the little things in life

John

1. He loves me for me
2. He works hard to look after the boys and I
3. He sacrifices things so we can have what we need (or want)
4. I love that when he goes away for work, he rings me everyday without fail just because he wants to.
5. I love how he watches a lot of re runs and really bad movies because I want to

How did your child (or pet) get their name?
He he.....when I saw this, I went straight to Andrew.
Andrew John came into this world at a funny time in my life.
My grandad had recently passed away not long before we found out I was pregnant. I "knew" it was a boy so wanted to forego the 20week "gender" scan.
He is named traditionally after an important man in my life.
Andrew is the middle name of my grandad and John is from...well John.
It just seemed appropriate to continue the name John and to take something from my grandad too.

Declan Phillip is a wee bit different.
We couldn't decide on a name and Declan was the only name we kept coming back to in the baby book that John liked and didn't make fun of.
Phillip is from my grandad. His full name is Phillip Andrew Ritchie and my boys have both his names somewhere.

John is away......

John went away for TWO weeks on Sunday 12 August.

I *should* of done a post on my first day as a "solo" parent, but I didnt really think about it.

The first day went ok until bed time rolled around and I realised that John was NOT coming home from work so I went to sleep in an empty bed for the first time in a few months. Ok, hes been away before (3 nights to Auckland for work or a few nights in hospital....) I should of just got on with it.
The first nights were good. I got the kids into a routine and we were eating junk for dinner (American Hotdogs, chicken burgers, hell pizza lol). Then Andrew woke up with his attitude and the past week has been a nightmare.

Last Thursday I did my groceries and got home and it hit me like a hammer. I was home in an empty house (until I got the kids) and I had no one. I spend my days texting John and having lunch with him and then he comes home from work and we watch telly and go to bed. This was more than 3 nights away. This was HORRIBLE. I cried!

Friday wasn't too bad. Declan decided to go to Johns nanas house for a sleep over and it was just Andrew and me. I spent the WHOLE night texting anybody who would text back and Facebooking anyone who would Facebook me back too. Johns brother wouldnt come over and watch telly with me and Johns friends were busy... it made me realise that although I have "friends", I have no one to call on when I am lonely and need someone. Everyone seems to be busy with their lives and too busy to let little old me in for a 5min chat. People also DO NOT visit anyone anymore either. Its all "sit at home and wait for someone to come to you".

Saturday I went to pick up Declan and he decided that he didnt want to come home. No amount of texting my BIL would make him come over and I even bribed him with petrol money to get home!

Sunday, Andrew and I had chocolate cheesecake for breakfast and blobbed out in front of the fire watching telly before picking Declan up (because lets face it, he had school the next day).
After I fed them, bathed them and put them to bed, I had another pity party and cried again. I MISSED JOHN.

Monday, Declan stayed home from school and we had telly lol. We also visited my best friend who is sick and just did nothing really. I attempted to mow the lawn, but ran out of petrol! And then it rained!

It is now Wednesday and even though I know John is home on Saturday, I miss him more with every day that passes. He is now on night shift (started last sunday) so instead of calling every night, he calls every afternoon. The nights are really long and Ive been playing Facebook games.

Even though I parent the kids by myself, this has been different and I do take my hat off to the actual solo parents out there that have to do this alone every day.

Im off to clean my house (who am I kidding?).

Much love
xoxoxo

#Day 65 summer blog

WHAT HELPS ME GET THROUGH A MELT DOWN?
NOTHING!
I yell and scream and cry and freak out and then it turns into a full on anxiety attack in most cases.
Its really awful and I don't know what to do about it. That makes me sad.


In other stuff....I have pictures!
John and I went to Te Papa last week......

#Day 42 + summer blog

DAY 42 FAVOURITE VACATION/HOLIDAY
Funnily enough, I haven't actually taken a "holiday". I have stayed in hospitals, friends houses, family houses etc, but never had an actual bonafide vacation. Sad eh?

DAY 43 THEN AND NOW PHOTO OF YOU
I dont actually have another photo of me other than the one I originally posted on week one. Sorry people. Im not a photo person. Im the one taking the photos. Even if I take a photo of myself in a mirror, I NEVER ever look as good in the picture than I did no more than 2mins before in the mirror.

DAY 44 ONE PIECE OF ADVICE YOU WANT TO GIVE YOUR CHILD
The only piece of advice I want to give my boys is to be yourself.
I have spent my whole life changing myself into someone who I thought others wanted me to be. I don't think I have ever been happy. I am a people pleaser and a door mat. I let people walk all over me and treat me like utter crap and Im an implosive person. Im the person that gets sick of it and thinks about stepping out in front of the train.
All I want for my kids is to be happy, be themselves and do what they want to do (when they are older) as no one can make your life but you.

DAY 45 GOT ANY GOOD MAKEUP TIPS/ROUTINES?
Im sorry. This is a short and sweet answer. I don't wear make up. I don't like it, it never looks right on me and I can't apply it to save myself. I also don't have the time, patience or money to spend on make up lol.
I have however just recently (ok almost 5months ago) gotten my lashes and brows tinted, but again I don't have the time or money to waste doing that on a regular basis.
I do wash my face every morning with Nutrogena oil free grapefruit face scrub. Thats it. No moisteriser or anything.
Im a simple girl really lol

DAY 46 FAVOURITE ROOM IN YOUR HOUSE
Again, a short post. I don't have a favourite room in my house (unless my bed counts). I hate my house. I hate the fact that nothing we do makes it look any better. I hate that its so dark and small.
My dream is to win lotto, knock it down and start again (unless I can sell it in the meantime).

DAY 47 A RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS
Is this something I have done? I do RAK all the time. Im a sucker for being nice to people.
I remember this one time, I offered to take this ladys trolley back for her (she had four kids with her I think) and it was raining. Not long after, I got some movie tickets sent to me in the mail. I thought that was pretty cool. Made my day until I realised that those two little tickets were going to cause nothing but arguments in the house lol.

DAY 48 FIVE THINGS TO DO IF THE POWER GOES OUT
Hehe all I can think of is "go to bed and snuggle with John"
Hmmmmm last time our power went out, I snuggled up on the couch with a book and read with my iPod playing.
There isnt much you can do when the power goes out. If it's night, light some candles etc.
I loved it when the power went out. No TV, no computer, no internet, no nothing and it was fantastic!
That doesn't really answer the post title, but what do you do when the power goes out?

DAY 50 IF YOU WERE PRESIDENT OR PRIME MINISTER FOR A DAY, WHAT ONE LAW WOULD YOU CHANGE?
I can't answer this. It would make so many people mad! There is soooo much I would do if I could, but I would also upset so many people. This is the sort of stuff I tell John. We kind of think a long the same lines as each other, but it's not something I am willing to share on here.

DAY 51 WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU WON THE LOTTERY?
Oooh I love this sort of thing.
I would knock my house down and start again with the house of my dreams.
I would give money to Johns nana to keep her comfortable for the rest of her life.
Take a holiday around the world etc
Thats the most part of it. The rest of it would be on silly little stuff like cars etc.

Blog Catch Up #2 From June 29

This is a HUGE catch up that I have been meaning to do for AGES.

DAY 29 WRITE A "HOW TO" POST
I have to be honest, I have been slowly neglecting this as the prompts are getting harder for me to do. A "how to" post makes me run and hide. Im not good at writing anything let alone a how to post and actually putting some thought into it lol.
So with the help of a fellow blogger, I am writing about a typical weekend in my house.
HOW TO SURVIVE A WEEKEND!
I dread weekends. I have two VERY ACTIVE boys that are up at sparrows fart and need to be occupied 24/7.

The only way you can survive in my house is to have a never ending supply of food and drink for the boys and then throw them outside (if its raining, put a coat on them). If that fails, pop in an action DVD or a sci-fi and give them a bowl of chippies or popcorn and a blanket.

Once you have done all that and they are quiet, you then have to think about what will happen when John gets home from work on Saturday afternoon. The only way I have found to do that is to keep him occupied with the telly (or computer game) and food and then curl up with a good book until its time to make dinner.

Then its start all over again on Sunday with John home. Thats pretty hard as John can be worse than the kids at times and its very hard to get him up to do something once hes on the couch engrossed in telly. Im pretty lucky its winter, because its perfect fire and telly weather.

DAY 30 MY SENSE OF STYLE
This post would be a bit hard on me too. I dont have a style as such. I wear what fits and what I feel comfortable in. I have tried trends and I just dont have the body shape (or money) to pull any of the current trends off.

Everytime I get dressed, I think I look like a movie star.....really I look like a frumpy mum with messy hair and a belly that looks like a baby is about to drop out of it and an ass to match.

This is the sort of stuff I would wear if I could look like the movie stars.

DAY 31 SOMETHING ECO FRIENDLY YOU DO

We are eco friendly (well I would like to think so)

I take our cardboard boxes (from packaging, food etc) to the local kindy for the collage box a long with my magazines and newspapers and plastic bags (for changes of clothes etc).

We have a compost for our food scraps. John dug a hole in the ground and when its full, hes going to fill it back in and thats how we make our compost.

When I was pregnant with Declan, I bought MCN. Those snazzy nappies with snaps and patterns etc on them.

Its not a lot to us, but its a wee bit more than anyone else would be doing.

I know that there is a lot more that we are doing that I just cant think of right now....oh water....I try and save water and tip grey water into the garden etc instead of tipping it down the drain.

DAY 32 SHARE A POEM

Im not really a poem type of gal, but my nana owned a book by Pam Ayres and I love her poems. There are too many to share, but here is one.

OH I WISH I'D LOOKED AFTER ME TEETH

Oh, I wish I’d looked after me teeth,
And spotted the dangers beneath
All the toffees I chewed,
And the sweet sticky food.
Oh, I wish I’d looked after me teeth.

I wish I’d been that much more willin’
When I had more tooth there than fillin’
To give up gobstoppers,
From respect to me choppers,
And to buy something else with me shillin’.

When I think of the lollies I licked
And the liquorice allsorts I picked,
Sherbet dabs, big and little,
All that hard peanut brittle,
My conscience gets horribly pricked.

My mother, she told me no end,
‘If you got a tooth, you got a friend.’
I was young then, and careless,
My toothbrush was hairless,
I never had much time to spend.

Oh I showed them the toothpaste all right,
I flashed it about late at night,
But up-and-down brushin’
And pokin’ and fussin’
Didn’t seem worth the time – I could bite!

If I’d known I was paving the way
To cavities, caps and decay,
The murder of fillin’s,
Injections and drillin’s,
I’d have thrown all me sherbet away.

So I lie in the old dentist’s chair,
And I gaze up his nose in despair,
And his drill it do whine
In these molars of mine.
‘Two amalgam,’ he’ll say, ‘for in there.’

How I laughed at my mother’s false teeth,
As they foamed in the waters beneath.
But now comes the reckonin’
It’s methey are beckonin’
Oh, I wish I’d looked after me teeth.

DAY 33 PLANS YOU HAVE FOR SUMMER

Oh this is easy! We have LOTS of plans for summer! Luckily Summer is in November so we have plenty of time to get saving!

• We need to re-build our wood shed and look at building an extra one
• We need to get some WOOD
• The house needs the painting finished outside
• The yard needs cleaning (which may happen this year)
• Under floor and ceiling insulation before summer is out
• We are hoping to do a re-jib and paint in the boys bedrooms (I think its called drywalling?)
• oh and now my brain has gone blank haha

DAY 34 FREE DAY....WILL COME BACK TO THIS

DAY 35 A FEAR YOU HAVE

I have a lot of fears....one is flying.

John watches A LOT of "air investigation" programs on National Geographic (or is that Discovery?) and I am already freaked out about flying as it is without all that. 

We had to go to Auckland last November to the hospital for John to have a procedure done.

We flew up in a 737 and it was a really bad flight for me. My seat was next to the wing and we were packed in like sardines. I got really scared and wanted off the plane, and having John talk about the plane dropping out of the sky was FREAKING me out even more.

I dont know why I am scared to fly, I mean I have done it twice about 20years ago in a little pencil plane.

I think its weird how your fears can spiral out of control as you get older. This is a fear that can seriously hold us back from doing things in life (unless I am sedated that is). It was great view from in the plane, but I was too scared to enjoy the flight (and really it was only about 30mins in the air anyway).

Thats my fear.

This is the end of this catch up. Hopefully I will be back on board in a few days.

I love reading comments that you have sent in, and I love to visit everyone who visits me. 

Much Love

Vikki

Happy Tuesday! #BlogChallenge

I have a few posts that I need to catch up on today......

Photo as a child
I dont have a photo of me as a child.....unless I turn my house upside down looking for one (and the chances of finding one is pretty slim)...sorry people.

Most Recent Words of Wisdom?
We are going through some major stuff at the moment. I think the most recent words of wisdom given to me has been "Don't be afraid to ask for help"
I have had a pretty bad upbringing and had to rely on myself for everything, so it is hard for me to swallow my pride and ask for help. Whether it is support I need or something else, I find it super hard to ask for help or to accept any form of help.

The next posts are from bloggers....


When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up? Hannah @ Baby Knows Best
Ohhhh this is a hard one.....I wanted to be so many things when I grew up.
I wanted to play Saxophone.
I wanted to be a teacher (primary/kindergarten)
I wanted to be a vet
I wanted to be a nurse
I wanted to be a mechanic
I think I have FINALLY settled on being a mum.


Favorite Blog Post you've written before this challenge. Alecia @ Chicken Scratch NY
I have a lot of favourite Blog Posts.
I wrote a post about how petty and horrible some women can be. I was very angry after years and years of harrassment and bullying. They had attacked me left right and center and I really should have left, but there were some really nice genuine people on there. I didnt name names, I didnt even put up links etc, but my blog had the most views and it still does on that one post.
I wrote a post about how PC we are becoming and its taking all the fun away from things and about how competitive people are now.


Favorite eco-friendly thing to do. Shai @ The Vagabond Studio
I dont see myself as an Eco-Friendly person....I do stuff because it makes sense to do it.
I turn off taps so they dont drip
I turn off lights to save power
We have a compost and a vege garden (although its not really a garden at the mo)
I just do stuff.


Ok...now for my post
We are going through some stuff at the mo, I dont particularly feel like doing the blog challenge anymore. I am going to keep doing it though as I am doing it for ME and not anyone else. It will also keep me occupied.
Today is a wet cold day. The kids are off at school. Declan got "star of the day" yesterday and has a few more newbies started. Andrew is doing pretty well too. John is out in the wop wops working today (in the rain etc) and we have Johns younger brother staying with us at the mo while hes on holiday.
Thats pretty much it. I want to spend some money, but we are flat broke til John gets paid and the credit card doesn't look too healthy lol, so most likely catching up on blogging and watching MySky stuff.


Much love
xoxoxo

Guilty Pleasure/Cooking Disaster/Famous Art

Today I have THREE updates for the blog challenge.....my fault for slacking (and John being home yesterday)

Guilty Pleasure


What is my guilty pleasure?
This was hard, but watching telly with the kids yesterday I got my guilty pleasure....
I may be 28yo, but I love watching Disney movies, Disney channel, High School Musical etc and Trashy reality shows (think Teen Mom, Teen Mom 2, 16 and pregnant). I had a crap childhood. I didn't get to watch much cartoons etc and I didn't get to go out to town or have friends over. I was also robbed of my teen years (although I try not to think about it that way) so I am still growing up now. So, while I am doing my blog update, I am watching Adventure Time (even though its really dumb).

Cooking Disaster


I had to ask John for help on this one. His answer? My pasta bake!
A few years ago, I made a Pasta Bake for dinner. The instructions on the sauce jar said "Place uncooked pasta in dish" so I did. I cooked it for the stated time and put cheese on top and then pulled it out and dished it up for dinner. The pasta DID NOT cook! It was raw, hard, crunchy and in the end we made toast (I think)...this is something John and his brother will not let me forget (a long with a lot of other things). John said this is my disaster...he will eat most things I cook, but this he didn't. Since then I have pre cooked the pasta for my pasta bake. So when there are instructions, you don't always have to follow them lol

Famous Art


Im not one for art, but my walls are covered in what I call "famous" art work. Andrew and Declans stuff is all over my walls, my pantry, up the hall way etc. I also have boxes and boxes of their art in cupboards. I have certificates on the wall too. With the kids art, I also have Johns National Certificate. These are my famous art works. I would like to say that if money was no option, I would hang a Mona Lisa or something but I wouldn't. I have no idea what is art and what isn't, I also have no idea on what is famous or worth money.

So there you have it.....my guilty pleasure, my cooking disaster and my famous art on the wall. I had a few days to think about all this and I still needed some help.

The kids have come in looking for food (even though they got two helpings of breakfast not even 1hour ago)...better go.

Happy Sunday
Much Love
xoxoxo

I cant sleep at night

I always seem to have so much on my mind that only seems to come out when Im tired as a dog and trying to sleep :(


The thing that was taking over my mind last night was my wee angel baby. This is kinda graphic (tampons etc lol)


I had a Miscarriage at 4wks pregnant the weekend before christmas 2011.


I thought that I would be ok with it. Not be one of those mums who talk about it all the time and moved on and accepted it. I spent the first 2wks afterwards feeling so relaxed and happy and saying that I was ok and it was Gods work and I wasnt ready for another baby because God had other plans for me (getting a job, working on myself, working on my house etc) so I was doing ok. Well thats what I thought until New Year arrived and no I clearly was NOT doing ok. The hormones suddenly dropped (just like after you have a baby) and I got really down because my GP did NOT do what she should have done (or what I thought she should have done at the time).


I tend to ramble a bit and go off tangent, but Im going to try my best to rehash it all. Will probably do me the world of good :)


Something that is part of my life now seems so silly to what other people go through time after time.


I had two very very very faint positive pregnancy tests done the week before my period was due. They were so damn faint I had to ask 3 different people to tell me what they could see and I took pictures lol. I couldnt believe my luck even though I wanted another baby so badly and thought I was seeing things.


I had the nausea, the tender boobs, the cramping etc that all pointed to a baby. I mean, I had had all that twice before so I didnt need a silly pee test to tell me what I already knew (and with my hormones, I had to wait at least another 4wks to get that dark line I was waiting for).
The night I started to bleed, I was cooking dinner and I was overcome with this awful cramping and back ache and knew that something wasnt right and I had the urge to go to the toilet. Just as well cause it was a bloody mess! No pun intended hahaha
So I cleaned myself up and went and had dinner and carried on. The pain had gone, the pregnancy symptoms were fading fast and there wasnt much I could do on a weekend night so I watched telly and went to bed and just did what I normally did.
The next day was Sunday and there was another mess to clean up and it was awful. The nice hot shower was great (although apparently it should be lukewarm or something) and I put in a tampon (I didnt know that was a no no and I was flooding out pads within 30mins) and we all got in the car and went for a drive to Johns parents place in Foxton (its about 1hr 30mins from home). 
I truly did NOT think about going to a dr. I really did think that I was ok and there was nothing to worry about.


I had flooded out my pad within 30mins of leaving home and there were clots etc and thats when my worry radar started to go off, but hey I was away from home and what could I do? It was a family day out with John and the kids.


Monday was probably the worst part. I succumbed to a friends worried text message and went to the dr. The nurse looked worried and said there wasnt anything they could do if it was a MC and that I could see the dr if I wanted to.
The dr made me to the pee test and of course nothing showed up so she said, "your not pregnant because the pee test said so, go home and try to rest" 
I tried to go for a blood test (thanks to my friend Trishy) and got "you dont need one" so I went home with no answers and feeling belated that I should have tried more.
I bled for a grand total of 5 nights and 4 days. It was not a Miscarriage like what you hear about from friends or what you read on the internet or in books. It only hurt for a little while and then I just bled. There was no cramping etc all the way through like when you have your period, it was just a pain free bleed with lots of mess and was very horrible. I didnt feel sad (like I thought I would), I felt relaxed and anxious and happy all at the same time. Because I didnt feel the way I thought I *should* I didnt listen to my friends and didnt get what I wanted from the dr and that PISSED ME OFF. I let myself down.


At Christmas, I became the bitch from christmas past. I had no tree, no stockings for the kids and only one present for each of them that I couldnt even be bothered to wrap and give them. I didnt have the big family christmas on the movies and I had lost my baby.
At New Years, I had a huge hormone thing happen and all I wanted was to have my MC accepted and acknowledged by family and the dr, but that didnt happen. Johns family didnt think that adding to our family would be a good idea, so I had to lie and just say it was a really heavy period etc and that I was ok blah blah blah when all I wanted to do was yell and scream and make people listen to me.


Its February now. I still want to talk about it. I want to do something to acknowledge that for that little time, I was going to be a mum again (it was unplanned).


About 3wks ago, a friend of mine came up to me and said she was pregnant again and was thinking of an abortion. It would be her 3rd abortion and I didnt know what to do. She later MC her baby too and I went to all the dr appts with her and her scan and texted her and talked to her and was there for her like I wanted people to do with me. I didnt get dr appts or a scan or even a friend to hug me when I wanted to cry. My friend and I were due on the same day and MC 3-4wks apart.


She is my one true friend IRL and I dont even think she knows how I was feeling or how Im doing now, she just knows that when her friends werent there for her, I was. I was there for her so she wasnt alone like I was and because I love her to pieces.


Now, I just dont know where I fit or where to go or who to talk to. I prayed to the Lord last night for the first time in a LONG time. 


The one problem I have is how to end my post lol. Im wiping away the tears and watching Ben 10 Ultimate Alien and alone and have no idea what Im going to do with the rest of my day. 


Much love to you all
xoxoxoxo

Zumba Thursday!

Happy Thursday everyone!

Im on Johns laptop and it has a shifty "enter" key so bear with me if there are typos :)

I woke up a wee bit late today (I dont think Im sleeping very well as I wake up really tired and have a dry mouth etc but I wont bore you), got the boys up and fed etc and pushed them out the door just in time to get Andrew to school. I thought after I dropped Declan at daycare, that it might be a good idea to wake myself up with the weekly beginners Zumba class at the gym. BOY was I wrong!

I was VERY uncoordinated today and couldn't manage to sort my feet into what they were MEANT to be doing because my arms and brain were telling me something very different to what the instructor was doing lol.

I must of done a pretty good job today despite wanting to crawl into bed and sleep because I worked up a mega sweat and felt a wee bit better! :)

As Im writing this post, we are waiting for John to get home from a late night at work. I have Declan next to me on the couch playing on my iPod (all I can here is "touch the A") and Andrew is taking over my massive telly with some gaming site he got off my friends 16yo son (yeah thanks heaps). I think its a pretty good site.... its www.friv.com and it has heaps of games on it that Andrew plays. The kids seem to be doing really well with the influx of gaming in the past week. They still go outside and play with cars and dig in the dirt etc, but with the gaming I let them do now (which BTW I was so totally against doing), they play really well together when they are playing with toys etc.

I dont know if I posted this before, but I made BLUEBERRY muffins the other week! Blueberries were 2 for $6 at Countdown so I grabbed some and made muffins lol. They were very good and I only made 6 as I put the mix in my Texas pan, but I have some more in the fridge so will have to make more and share the recipe and a photo (or 100).

Im about to start going off on a tangent as Im pretty knackered so will leave you with the thought of my muffins

Much Love
xoxox

Ode to my wonderful husband!

This post is dedicated to my wonderful husband!


I do not take enough time out in my day to truly tell John how much I love and appreciate him.
He does an awesome thing everyday by getting up super early and going to work until way past dinner time on most days. Most days he works in the workshop in town (which is great cos we have lunch together) and other times he travels for HOURS to get where he needs to be to fix things that are broken to keep people working (logging, forestry, earth moving people etc) and he just does it because he loves it and because he HAS to.


He took us (me and the two boys) out to where he spent most of last week working because he left a spanner out there and needed to finish a job and purely because it beat sitting inside all day eating each other. It was a FOUR hour return trip to site for a good 20min job and he did it without complaining about it. Was a good way to waste a day!


Here are some pics of what he works on:

This is soooo much bigger than the pic lets on lol

Thats Johns little wee work truck on the left lol

The boys sitting and watching Daddy working
Declan is the brown haired and Andrew is the blonde!

Some of the logs that need cutting for the stack 

Oh and I have more pics, but will wait til tomorrow so I don't over load you with my boys hehehe